From diapers to degrees: Busy mom juggles kids and school

Susan Shue is an “everyday mom.” But she’s far from ordinary. Here’s what this Army wife says about her busy and rewarding life as a stay-at-home mom:

Favorite sound:

When I get home, I’m welcomed by the girls screaming, “Mommy, mommy, mommy!”

Hobbies/activities:

I like to read, bake and sew, but I haven’t had much time to do any of those lately. I LOVE to scrapbook... which is also an infrequent occurrence because the kids need to get, and stay, occupied with something or someone else.

Favorite activity with kids:

Reading to them. I ask them questions about things on the pages -— what color something is, what it’s called, how many there are, etc. — and praise them for their effort.

Least favorite “mom chore”:

Washing the diapers. I use cloth diapers when we’re at home to cut down on garbage and save money.

Advice to new moms:

Be accepting of yourself. You will be frustrated sometimes. You will cry sometimes. You will doubt yourself and question your abilities. But that’s OK! Motherhood is a big adjustment. Give yourself time and allow yourself to accept help when it’s offered, and to ask for it when you need it.

Funny story:

When I was pregnant with Carissa, Layla would always rub my belly and say, “Baby in there!” One day while shopping, she start rubbing my butt (which is where I gained all my pregnancy weight that wasn’t baby) and said, “Baby in there!” The poor store associate was trying not to laugh. I still laugh when I think about it.

Hopes and dreams:

I’m working toward my nursing degree ... I want my children to be proud of me. I want them to see that hard work pays off, and I want to be able to help people. Once my kids are grown, I would love to volunteer with the Red Cross or some other of organization that helps during disasters.

On military life:

It makes you realize how strong you are. Women tend to underestimate themselves, their abilities and strengths. But when you’re a military spouse you are tested time and again. We’re forced to go outside our comfort zones, to deal with things by ourselves that we would rightly dread even when our soldier is home. Civilians will tell you all the time that they “couldn’t do it,” but really it’s just that they’ve never had to. But a great thing about military life can be the friendships you make. Military spouses rely on each other. You need to. With no family around, they are all the support you have.

The most challenging thing about Layla’s age (3 1/2):

Her curiosity. She’s always asking a lot of questions and sometimes I struggle to answer them appropriately and in a way that makes sense to her. I feel even worse when I don’t know the answer to her question! The best thing about Layla’s age: Her curiosity! It’s strange, but I’m so proud of her when she questions things, because it’s a sign of how much older she’s getting.

The most challenging thing about Carissa’s age (2):

She’s still developing her vocabulary and gets extremely frustrated when she can’t express herself. I try to help her by repeating back what I think she said or is trying to say, but it can still be upsetting for her.

The best thing about Carissa’s age:

How much she’s attached to me, which would probably not be as enjoyable if she was in childcare. I just love walking in the door after class and hearing her yelling so excitedly for me. It makes me feel so appreciated and loved. And don’t we all want that from our kids?

Thoughts on the label “Terrible Twos”:

It is more a mindset than anything else. I’m not denying that a child’s behavior changes over time, and it may be more drastic during that age, but if you expect the bad in something you’re sure to find it ... I just tried to take everything as it came and not dwell on the less than desirable moments. This approached worked pretty well for me and I intend on following it with Carissa, although I can tell that Carissa’s 2-3 year old stage will be more challenging than Layla’s was. She has a different, more aggressive, outgoing personality, so it will take some adjustment.

How would your kids describe you?

Outgoing (which I’m sure will lead to some embarrassment on their part as they get older), talkative, and fun. I really enjoy playing with them. I joke around that all the cool toys were invented after I was too old to play with them.

Favorite kids books:

My three favorite kids books were all sent to us by the Dolly Parton Imagination Library program (you can pick up a form at your local library and sign your kids up to get a free book every month). My top favorite is “The Gruffalo” by Julia Donaldson, with illustrations by Axel Scheffler. It is lyrical, and so cute. Layla can practically recite it along with me. Tied for a close second are Anne Dewdney’s books, “Llama Llama Red Pajama,” and “Llama Llama Mad at Mama”... Reading to my kids is one of the most important things I do all day.

You can share your thoughts and family photos with Susan Shue and other moms at 910moms.com.