Raising boys

I have 2 boys 8 and 11. My 11 year old is lazy and unfocused, he has organizaional problems and nothing i do is working with him. Does anyone have any advice for me where this is concerned.

Thanks

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Permalink Reply by Nicole on October 31, 2009 at 4:42pm: Definitely play off his strengths and interest. More than likely, you will have to pump him up with positivity just to get him started and then try to reward him. Rewards create motivation.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sabrina Maestas on May 1, 2010 at 7:44pm: Do you mind if I ask what strategies you've tried? I agree with the other posts about using a reward system and paying attention to his strenghts. I have found that a positive attitude goes a long way. Make things as fun as possible. Below is a list of some things I do with my 8 year old that work pretty well to keep him focused and on task.

-Make a competition out of tasks that need to be completed in a timely manner......We race to see who can get dressed the quickest for school in the mornings & getting to the car. Just don't make too many things a competition it or he'll get burnt out.
-Offer an allowance for chores.......Rewards go a long way, and at this age, an allowance would probably do wonders. My son gets a certain amount of money for each task completed, which makes it a little easier for him to remember to do his chores daily.
-As for organizing, I think it just takes practice. My son struggles with organizing his things as well. I'm a very organized person & have set up his room well, but he's still such a pack rat! Maybe someone else has some great ideas for this....I'd like to get this under control as well.
-Get active....set up a time everyday that you can get outdoors or go to the gym and do something as a family. Go for a walk, ride bikes together, anything that gets him up and moving. Physical activity naturally improves your mood.

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Permalink Reply by Steve Edelman on July 7, 2010 at 8:01am: I don't know how many video games your children have. There was a recent research article published at www.sciencedaily.com that discussed the effects of playing video games and watching television on attention in children. I highly recommend it.; ▶ Reply to This